Favorite Photos - Last Day of the Year!

I thought I'd post a couple more pictures for the fun of it. Tomorrow will start the photo a day thing, so hopefully I'm getting all the uninspired pics out the way early!

My kitties:



My 16-year old when she passed the test to get her driving permit:



I just like this picture. Don't know why, but here it is!



(Again) Happy New Year!

2006 Accomplishments

It's a rainy, dreary morning to wake up to but I don't mind. 2006 has been a pretty good year for us and I'm going to finally respond to the "Seven Accomplishments" meme that Newscoma tagged me with last week.

Number One: Got both my daughters enrolled in school with positive attitudes. The youngest started middle school and was nervous and scared, but really loves it. The oldest is in 10th grade and has done quite well with subjects that I never had the courage to take: Chemistry and Geometry.

Number Two: Made it to 20th wedding anniversary with husband. We haven't killed each other yet and still laugh at each other's stupid, predictable jokes. We like spending time together and are truly grateful for having someone to scratch our backs, someone to sometimes chase down the hall giggling, and most importantly someone to share beans with (I hate chili beans and pick them out to give to my husband).

Number Three: Even with the real estate slump, I managed to make a little more money than I did last year. My goal in 2007 is to double my business and continue doing so in order for my husband to be able to retire from his job so we can work together.

Number Four: Started this blog, originally named "Resistance is NOT Futile." I changed the name when I decided I didn't want to focus on government, etc. but preferred to babble. My bloggiversary is on January 13th and the first entries set the precedent for being lame, but I've learned to not to be paranoid about it because I'm writing for myself. If anyone else reads and enjoys, that's just great.

Number Five: Started the LaVergne blog. It was an attempt to bring information and conversation to the residents of the community. With Chip and Ivy as contributing authors, we've definitely accomplished that - the unwitting controversy we have brought to the table has helped open discussions with the city and raised awareness on various issues (election parking, stupid name for school which will remain unchanged, etc.).

Number Six: Raised awareness for the "Christmas for the Children" efforts to provide gifts for the kids in LaVergne and Smyrna who wouldn't otherwise have a Christmas.

Number Seven: Met some of the smartest, nicest people in middle Tennessee through blogging. I'm dumbfounded that I've been so lucky to become acquainted with such amazing people. I want to shout out to Smiffster, Lynnster, Newscoma & SQ, CLC, Kerry, M., Michael, Gunner & Elizabeth, Malia, Sonia, Aunt B., Kat Coble, Shauna, Jamie & Jamie, Brittney, Ginger, Heather, SaraSue, B-Dub, Rachel, Tim, John H., Sam, Rex, Mark, Jeffraham, Finn, and everyone I've inadvertently left off and am so ashamed of myself for doing so. (And I left off Ivy and Chip because I met them before blogging!).

Number Eight: I feel like I've been a true friend to a lot of people I truly care about. I was there to listen as Mandi struggled through a difficult time with a former friend and rejoiced with her when I learned she was pregnant, I took another friend to a doctor and a domestic abuse office when she was injured by her husband (and tried to give her comfort as she suffered through two miscarriages), I went with a friend to document a notorious head shave (an act of courage and compassion), and I helped another friend who didn't think she could buy a home.

Number Nine: I've told my parents I love them more. I tell my husband I love him more. I tell my kids how much I love them, too.

Number Ten: I accept that I will be judged by other people and they can be cruel. I have learned that it doesn't matter because I will continue to try to be a good person. Even though I'm boring at times, I am interesting at other times. I can be comfortable with myself.

Happy 2007!

Yet Another 2006 Photo

I thought this picture was funny. We took it during Thanksgiving at my husband's aunt's house in Greenville, Kentucky. They opened Christmas presents early because the aunt and uncle were heading to Texas for four months and wouldn't be here over the holidays.



I've been watching a lot of coverage about Saddam Hussein today. It's a shame that news takes precedence of the big ice shelf breaking off in Canada. That's real scary stuff, to me.

Picture Today (and Buh Bye Saddam)

My pictures a day aren't going to be much fun, I can already tell.



Not much to post about here except we're on Saddam watch. It creeps me out that someone is scheduled to die. It's just a little bit horrifying that someone would know when the end will be. But I suppose people with incurable cancer and other diseases have a pretty good idea when their time is coming. So would I want to die unexpectedly or would I want to know when? I think I'd want a little notice to have time to make final preparations (write my own eulogy) and say goodbye to my loved ones. In that, perhaps Saddam's way to go is the best. But hanging? Sheesh. How about an injection or something?

Yikes. What a conversation.

UPDATE: I guess the higher you are, the harder you do fall. Saddam reached the end of the rope as a vicious dictator who directed cruelty, hatred, and murder to other human beings. My only question that remains: where is Osama bin Laden who truly deserves the same fate?

Oops... a photo from 2006

That previous post wasn't from 2006... more like 1964'ish. So here's one from this year before midnight. Maybe.



It's my daughter bundled up in the scarf her godmother made her. No, we aren't Muslim. My sis-in-law is completely into knitting and she does a really good job. I'll stop kissing up now (I'm hinting for a blankie!). ha.

It's Still the Christmas Season, Right?

Although Christmas is over for 2006, the season continues for as long as we have our tree up! Since it's still up, my picture today is from Christmas past.


That's me on the left holding my Chatty Cathy doll, my brother Jim, sister Karen holding her Chatty Cathy, and brother Mike. This is definitely one of my very favorite Christmas pictures from when we were little. I also have to give my Mom kudos for having four kids and floor clean enough that you can see our reflection in it. Geez, my floor didn't look that clean BEFORE I had kids. We asked our Mom this Christmas what happened to the old ornaments she had on her tree and she told us she gave them to us a couple of years ago. Only, none of us remember getting them. We're thinking they may still be in her attic, so that may be a project later this year.

Memories of 2006 !! in photos !!

Since there are only five days left of 2006, I thought I'd get a jump start on the photo a day gig that Brittney pointed to that Rex announced by picking five of my favorite various photos of 2006. Let me be clear ... it doesn't mean that all the photos I post in 2007 will be NEW (they'll probably be from 2006 or before) because I'm lazy like that. But here we go:



I thought Kitty's eyes made her look a little evil, but decided she looks more like Yoda. See?



Kitty, her name is. Sweet, she is. More creative, I'll be later because sleepy, I am. Night, good.

Yeah, What John Said

I'm following John H's example and submitted this site for the 25Peeps thingie. As I said to John in a congratulatory comment because he made the 25, I'm not really sure the point. But since I have about 10 more hours of vacation before I have to be back at work tomorrow, I'm going for it.

Here's where you go.

And go visit John again, too, because he is a fine speciman of peep.

Breaking "Flavor Flav'ish" News

I was watching some craptastic drivel on VH1 today, I saw a preview, and now I'm setting my DVR.

I Love New York is coming!

It's like one of those bachelor/bachelorette shows where she gets to have a bunch of guys compete for her love. Let me tell you, New York's (aka Tiffany) TV persona on The Flavor of Love (Flavor Flav!) was hilarious - she was hateful, nasty, arrogant, conceited, obnoxious, unfair, meddling, dramatic, and MEAN. And her Mom was even worse to the point that it was embarrassingly funny to watch.

You heard it here first. Or second. Or you just heard it here. New York has her own show and it's sure to be a laugh riot.

Christmas in Pictures

I just dumped something like 175 photos from my digi-cam to my computer, so I thought I'd share my favorites from Christmas. Ho ho ho good times.

Our 20th anniversary at Applebees. Yes, Applebees. It was that or Taco Johns.



My dad cooking my favorite breakfast.



Pancakes with fried eggs on top. He used to fix that for us when Mom was having babies (there are six of us) or the time or two she had to go out of town (to see her sister in New Jersey). I loved the eggs on top of pancakes then and it remains my favorite.



Part of the nieces and my daughters piling on the couch.



My sister and her daughters. From left: Rebecca is a HS senior this year and is hoping to go to University of Kentucky, depending on what kind of scholarship money she gets. My sister who rarely poses great in a photo. This one is good except she's picking her teeth. My niece Rachel who is a sophomore at University of Louisville. My niece Kathy who is CFO for a golf club community in Bowling Green.



Look! My sister-in-law got all the kids screaming monkeys. I LOVE THEM! There was no "Fat Bas*ard" wine to go along with them, though.



My niece Leah and my Dad (grandpa) on Christmas Eve.



My brother Dean and sis-in-law Martha. I can't exactly remember what he was doing, but it was funny at the time.



My niece Angie. She's such a talented girl... she also graduates from HS this year and wants to get into art. I say she could've gone into music given her songbird voice.



My Mom opening her cookie jar filled with nuts. She's in her late 60s now and is just starting to sprout gray hairs.



As adults, we kind of stand back and watch the kids opening their presents. Three of my four brothers are pictured: Mike (we just see part of his face), Steve, Dean, husband Richard, sis-in-law Trish, and back of Dad's head.



One of my favorite photos ever of my parents, except we can't see Dad's face.



But here's his face as he's surrounded by more hugs. :) hee hee.



My girls and their cousin Trevor.



My girls getting their Tomagatchi pets to communicate.



Our blurry tree. I guess it had too much to drink.



My daughter the elf. I love this picture of her.



Christmas morning and my baby opens her presents. She had a marvelous time and we had such a great day!



That's it for now! Again, Merry Christmas!

A to Z Meme

I haven't downloaded Christmas pictures but I'm thinking about it, we're out of milk so I can't fix a bowl of cereal, Judge Judy is on TV, and the kids are still sleeping. That's my morning so far. So instead of getting up to clean house or scramble some eggs, I'm goofing off on this computer.

A- Available or taken? Taken
B- Best Friend? Too hard to say ... can I have more than one?
C- Cake or Pie? Cake
D- Drink of Choice? Diet Cream Soda or Coffee
E- Essential Item? Cell phone
F- Favorite Color? Blue
G- Gummi Bears or Worms? Bears
H- Hometown? Air Force brat, but if I had to pick I'd go with Dawson Springs, Ky.
I- Indulgence? Hmmmm... ice cream and too much Star Trek
J- January or February? February - it's shorter so brings you closer to spring
K- Kids and names? Two daughters - Hillanator or Moolissa
L- Life is incomplete without? Husband
M- Marriage Date? December 23, 1986.
N- Number of Siblings? One sister, four brothers
O- Oranges or apples? Oranges
P- Phobias/Fears? Cockroaches.
Q- Favorite Quote? Thank you! Come Again! (from Harold & Kumar go to White Castle)
R- Reason to Smile? No freakish dysfunctional family moments yesterday.
S- Season? Autumn, cool weather, great smells.
T- Tag three people! Who wants it? You, you and you.
U- Unknown Fact About Me? When I was 12, I invested my babysitting money in the stock market. It took me 10 years to double my investment.
V- Vegetable you hate? Brussel sprouts
W- Worst habit? So many to choose from, but I'll settle on picking the dry skin off my feet.
X- X-Rays you've had? Lots... last one was when I had gall bladder attack.
Y- Your favorite food? If I had to pick just one, homemade mac and cheese.
Z- Zodiac? Cancer. That's something I don't get about July kids - we are crabs and cancer. Why couldn't we be something nice and not-so-fatal like raccoons and eye goo?

Peace Be With You This Christmas

Merry Christmas to my family and friends this gloomy, yet beautiful day. We spent the weekend with my parents, sister, brothers, their spouses, and their children and had a very nice time. We got home late last night so the girls could be home Christmas morning.

No fighting yesterday, maybe some political jokes and some off-color humor, but all-in-all a really good day! I played dominoes with my brother and sis-in-law and was in the lead when we had to stop for dinner (I say that for my uncle who always makes a point in his emails of not telling who won because he always wins and doesn't want to appear to be bragging! haha. He does the same when they go fishing... won't say how many he caught so other won't feel bad.).

We went to mass on Sunday and got to experience the quasi-new priest (new to their church, anyway) again. Now I've known a lot of priests in my life and they are usually kind, good-hearted people. But on occasion we get one with issues. I don't want to be ugly when I describe a priest, but this guy is just kind of power hungry. When he says mass, he says all the required parts, but he will randomly leave out traditional (but not required) parts when he wants for reasons apparent only to him.

Yesterday, he left out the customary "Let us offer each other a sign of peace" during the "rite of peace," thereby depriving the congregation the opportunity to greet each other during mass with love and friendship. I saw parishioners looking at each other and a few shook their heads. It was almost as if the priest were behaving in a passive aggressive manner. I'm truly hoping he has some rationale behind his decision besides just to demonstrate that he's in charge of that parish, but I'm not too optimistic. Maybe he skipped it so people wouldn't focus on each other, but rather the real meaning of Christmas. I'd believe that except my family says he does it sporadically throughout the year.

Psychological analysis aside, let's get back to the mass. Communion followed the "rite of peace" and I witnessed determined love. The priest did not see his parishioners quietly smiling at each other and gently touching each others' hands as they got in line to go to communion. The church family surreptitiously flashed peace signs or mouthed the word "peace" to one another. After communion, the priest ended mass with the traditional, "Mass is ended. Go now in peace." The congregation left the church with joy and peace in their hearts, ready to celebrate the birth of Jesus and a season of hope and love.

Margaret's Wrinkles

Margaret will always hold a special place in my heart as the woman who helped to raise my husband because her sister, who worked out-of-town, had no access to child care. Margaret is almost childlike in her joy for life and recited highlights in diary-like stanza.

Like her sister Velma, one of her earliest memories was the crushing loss of her Daddy, who was the family’s primary caregiver. He worried during his illness loudly enough for his daughter to hear, “What’s going to happen to my children if something happens to me?” After he died, the children learned his worries were justified; they were sent to different homes.

Margaret recalls her Mother living with and working for Primley Farmer, and they handed out commodities to buy food. Later, she was sent to live with her Uncle Abraham Lincoln Cotton (Uncle Link) for a couple of years, but also spent time with her Uncle Jim the preacher and Aunt Berthie Cotton. She soon began earning her own money by caring for Dr. Simpson’s mother and father before school. Margaret worked for the Skaggs family, earning five dollars a week doing laundry. She washed the laundry on a wash board and wrung the clothes through a hand wringer and into the rinse water. She also learned to milk cows while working for the Skaggs. Margaret worked for the Murphey family (where she was saved at Green Chapel Church), with E.B. and Floella Dukes (in Louisville). At one point, she remembered earning more money than her Daddy; he made 75 cents per day and she was earning a dollar.

Eventually, Margaret moved back home with her mother who lived over the Casey Food Market at the corner of Depot Street in Greenville. One day she and her best friend Dorothy Baker were walking along the sidewalks of Greenville and noticed a soldier boy and his cousin next to Williams and Wells Drug Store. The soldier said, “I’ll take the little fat one.”

On that first double-date, the foursome followed their mothers to the Bisby Traveling Show. They rode the Farris wheel and all the other rides while their mothers stood around and watched them. When Pack was shipped off in World War II, Margaret repeated and again passed 8^th grade, then she passed 9^th grade as well. She still pined for her soldier and wrote to him often when he was stationed in the Philippines and in Japan. Meanwhile, his cousin married her friend Dorothy, but died later in a car wreck (Dorothy eventually remarried to Buzz Rose). The 23-year old Pack finally returned home and on June 20, 1946 he married the 16-year old Margaret. Today, they have two children, four grandchildren, and four great-grandchildren.

Margaret did continue to work in sewing factories in Muhlenberg County. She sewed labels, made blue jeans for Levi, and worked for Cowden and Dame. But there aren’t any sewing factories left in that area as they’ve all closed and the jobs have been sent to Mexico.

Margaret spends a lot of her time nowadays at her church, which is right across the street from her home. She remembers when Pastor Fox took her to the cow pond behind the church to baptize her. The bovines were standing around watching her as she was dunked, and Margaret was careful to keep her lips tightly sealed because she didn’t want to get cow water in her mouth. After she was baptized, she ran home to take a shower to get rid of the smell.

Pack is the oldest deacon and recently gave up his position as church treasurer. They have gone to Texas to spend the winter with their daughter. Margaret’s daughter has been a foster mother for many years and is currently caring for a girl that was placed with them at 10-days old and another little girl who is 7-months old. Margaret is a little worried about outstaying her welcome with her daughter, but is looking forward to the Texas sun during the long, cold winter.

Laughy Laugherson > Whiny Whinerson

It's a rainy, craptastic kind of day but I had to get out to get some chocolate bark and veggies for the obligatory vegetable tray I bring to Mom & Dad's every year. I also had to go to the post office to mail our cards that everyone will get AFTER Christmas. My youngest daughter went with me, yelling and crying the whole way because she hates her school picture this year.

Daughter: "Please, Momma, PLEASE!!! Don't put the picture in! I hate it! It's ugly of me!" (and she snatches the letters out of my hands).

Me: "Give me those envelopes."

Daughter: "NOOOOOOO! You are NOT getting them! I hate that picture!"

Me: "Give. me. the. envelopes. NOW. I'm not going to spend $48 on pictures that I throw away."

Daughter: "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!! You're so mean! That's not fair!"

Blah blablabla Blah... I got the cards away from her and we went to the post office. So my mood was naturally a little bit sour. The line itself wasn't too long, but when customers reached the postal clerks, they took about 20 minutes each to mail one little box each. Sigh. From the corner of my eye, I spotted a woman walk in and get in line about three folks behind me. Before I knew it, she cut up to the front, interrupting a customer already talking at a window.

Line Cutter: "Can I just leave this envelope here with you?"

Clerk: "No ma'am. That's Fed Ex. We don't deliver Fed Ex packages."

Line Cutter: "You all go to the same places."

Clerk: "Ma'am, they are our competitors. There is a drop box right across the street."

Line Cutter: "You can't take it?"

Clerk: "No ma'am. It's a different company."

Line Cutter: "Could you look at the label for me to see if I've filled it out right, then?"

Clerk (dumbfounded): "I'm sure it's fine. You can take it to the drop box across the street."

Line Cutter: "Okay! Thanks!"

I had to turn my back to her or I would've scoffed and snorted out loud. As it was, I just muffled my laughs and was so thankful she was there to brighten my day. Thank you, confused lady. You definitely cracked me up.

Blogs Don't Make ME Peckish

People who blog have taken a lot of criticism in 2006. There was the Nashville Scene's funny little piece:

"Bloggers blogged about their anticipation of the event, they posted photos on their blogs of themselves with other bloggers, and many bloggers rushed home to blog about how nice it was to meet people who are bloggers—just like themselves!"

There was the infamous "Nemesis Boy" who pulled the fast one on "even Nashville’s most 'intelligent' web surfers." When Kate was Nemesis Boy, I didn't hold her in high regard. Now that she's not, I still don't. But she got an "A" because she was a pretty good liar manipulator, so good for her. The bottom line is we all tell our children, "Be careful who you talk to online. They may say they're a preteen bookworm, but they may really be a middle-aged old pervert." How is that different than what Nemesis Boy did?

There was the interesting piece published by Open Source magazine: 200 Million People Can't be Wrong About Blogging. 200 million people have now stopped posting. I do miss Crap & Drivel, but otherwise the people I like to read still blog.

If you don't like reading blogs, don't. If you don't want to write one, don't. If you want to experiment on bloggers, whatever. I'm not trying to be pretentious or self-important. I'm just doing something I enjoy... writing, talking to other people, listening to opinions, following politics, etc. But because you insinuated that bloggers don't have lives (Captain Kirk, how could you betray us?), I suppose I'd better just go hide in my room and cry for a while. Sniff sniff.

UPDATE: So, I begin a lot of sentences like that. Yo. And I talk like this. I ROFLMAO and say OMG, too. Sometimes I throw up in my mouth a little. I'm a typical, misguided blogger who overuses old cliches! Woot!

Getting in the Christmas Spirit

Yo ho ho. I feel like this is going to be a big posting day... why? Because I have about 2 days worth of errands to run, rooms to clean, cookies to bake and this is a great way to procrastinate. My Motorola Razr phone isn't working (it just keeps showing "Unable to Charge") so I have to take that somewhere to have a battery fixed. I have a stack of about 50 Christmas cards that haven't been mailed and one wailing 11-year old who's boo-hooing because she hates her school picture and doesn't want it to be sent to anyone. She loved the picture until her Daddy said she looked like the lunch lady (her hair was pulled back in a tight bun). Thanks, Daddy. The other daughter hates the pic I'm using for her, too. I had snapfish develop some because I didn't order her school pictures in time. Arg.

So I'm copying Ginger and Sonia and whoever else has done this and my gift (like them) is to not tag anyone!

Favorite Christmas Movie: When I was a tween, I loved the song "Sunshine" by John Denver. Then Cliff DeYoung did a version (or maybe another song altogether ... I don't remember) and he starred in the movie "Sunshine." It was about a man who lost his wife and had to raise his young daughter alone with his guitar and motorcycle. He was a hippy and hung out with his hippy friends. Then they made "A Sunshine Christmas" movie. I loved it until I happened upon it last year and realized what a truly dated flick it was. That moves me to "Christmas Vacation" and "Elf" ... I love both of these. My favorite line is "Did you HEAR THAT?" after the Buddy burped (in fact, that's a much-used line in my own home). But the favorite has to be "It's a Wonderful Life" because it's held up through the years and still makes me cry even though I've seen it a kazillion times.

Favorite Christmas Song: I like "Oh Come All Ye Faithful" the best because I can hit all the notes with this terrible singing voice of mine (again, dogs howl and babies cry when I sing - no exaggeration). I also like "Angels we Have Heard on High" because of all the Glo-o-o-o-o-ria's. I also admit that I love "Do They Know It's Christmas" by the generous people of Band-Aid, the 80s version of "Cool People Care" that wrote and recorded the song to raise money to end hunger in Africa.

Favorite Christmas Cookie: My own version of the Girl Scout 's Tagalongs (Peanut Butter Patties in other parts of the country) is quite good. Make peanut butter sandwiches using just peanut butter and Ritz crackers. Then dip them in melted chocolate bark. Shockingly delicious. I also love the "Magic Cookie Bars" (we call them goobers here) and the Oatmeal/peanut butter no-bake cookies.

Favorite Christmas Gift Ever Received: I loved the record player I got when I was about 12 or 13-years old. It had little detachable speakers and I would lay down on the floor and put one speaker at each ear and listen to Neil Diamond and the Eagles. I also love the photo my sis gave me last year in the "sisters" picture frame. Aw. And anything my husband gives me trying to be sensitive and sweet (my dragon calendar last year because I love Anne McCaffrey's Dragonriders of Pern series). And he once framed a poem I wrote about squirrels (it was just hideous - the poem I mean).

Least favorite thing about Christmas: Living away from my parents, brothers and sisters. We all get together on Christmas Eve and used to stay the night until our daughters started saying they wanted to be home Christmas morning. Now we return Christmas Eve night. It makes for a long, tired Christmas day.

Where would your perfect Christmas be: In a mountain cabin with snow falling outside. Roaring fire. By cabin, I mean mansion big enough to house everyone... all 30-ish of us.

Favorite part of Christmas: Watching my kids pick out, wrap, and open gifts. Also seeing people smile at stores rather than glare. Oh! And I love Christmas lights and the carols! I also quite enjoy looking at the Nativity scenes. Dang. I just love Christmas!

Favorite Christmas decoration you own: It used to be my styrofoam egg that I made in 1st or 2nd grade. But now it has to be these two ornaments. The one on top is my youngest daughter in preschool. The ornament on the bottom right is my oldest daughter's "1st Christmas" ... notice her Eraserhead hair? ha.

When do you put up the tree? Usually two to three weeks before Christmas.

Do you wear "holiday" sweaters/ sweatshirts/ t shirts? I have a sweater (not a pullover sweater) that I sometimes wear. And a plain white shirt with a snowflake in the middle.

Merry Christmas everyone!

Blogrolling

Merry Christmas to me... I've finally sat myself down and am pretending to be the Brittmeister by blogrolling people. Here they are:

Why Don't You Just Call Me Linda
Cup of Joe Powell (are they related?!)
Holiday Grinch
Finn (I've Noticed)
Presto Chango (Jeffraham)
Les Jones
Rex L. Camino
Sam Davidson
Sarcastro

Gah. I'm a little embarrassed that I've been so remiss, especially with the famous bloggers. Famous, yeah. You know who you are. You can admit it. I've also recently added:

GingerSnaps
Fussy
Mocha Momma (her coffee arrived yesterday and it is DEE-LISH-US)
SaraSue

My Weird Cat

I feel a little bit like Jeffraham today because I'm posting a picture of my cat. In her old age, she will not stay on the floor. When she has to get from Point A to Point B, she trots to minimize her paw-touching-the-floor time (she's too old to run now). If we have any boxes, she'll sit on them. Or she sits on the coffee table or on the couch arm. She does like laying on wrapping paper if it's on the floor. But that's it. Pootster is usually sleeping, eating, or crying to eat, and she's just skin and bones. I'm taking her to the vet after Christmas to see what we can do to help the almost 19-year old kitty.

Wow Dryers

Has anyone seen these superpowerfulmegastronghotairhanddryers? I've seen them before and have been impressed, but finally took the photo at Target today. It's kind of freaky how it blows your skin around. I wish this camera phone picture was better, but you can kind of see the skin being blown around on my index finger.



Oh, and those are freckles not age spots.

Making a List

I was going to call today's post my Thankful Thursday since Woeful Wednesday is just not working for me. But alas, I'm taking the easy way out and just making a list, albeit for what/whom I'm thankful.

• I'm grateful for having met so many Neat-o people through blogging. I want so badly to list everyone here but because I'm sure to miss someone I'm just going to make that big blanket statement. Thanks guys and gals for bringing much laughter, thought, and kind words into my life. I've met a lot of you and have become fast (hopefully lifelong) friends with some. Others I haven't had the privilege to meet (yet!) but you too have brought joy, tears, and a sense of belonging to a vibrant, smart community.
  
• I am grateful for today's technology that allows me to type in my mailing labels to slap on the Christmas cards that I have yet to start. If I had to hand address them, my friends and family could look forward to getting them around January 28th.
• I am thankful that I only send out the pathetic family letters to people who already know what goobers we are. They already laugh and make fun of us, so at least we can give them a reason to do so. Aren't families fun!? ha.
• I am very happy that I had two closings this month so I am able to treat each of my daughters to "Mom's Day Out" lunch and shopping. The teenager had her day out on Monday (she's back in her room chained to her bed) and the pre-teen gets to go today after school (2-hour day).
• I am shocked thankful that my marriage has made it 20 years. This Saturday the 23rd we will have a quiet dinner together, hold hands, and say "Hey Freakshow. I love you."
• I am incredibly happy that my daughters love wrapping Christmas presents. This means I no longer have to stoop over for two hours, popping a disc in my aching back, to accomplish this. When your kids get to this age, they also like decorating the tree. If I could find a way to make them want to CLEAN the house, then I'd bottle the idea and sell it.
• I am grateful to work in an office and in a business where compassion and helpfulness is not just talk, but a way of life. Last night, we gave out gifts and clothing to more than 100 children in LaVergne and Smyrna for Christmas. My family had eight children and the mother said the gifts we provided were to be the only Christmas her children had. I know some people may get angry at those words and one person even said, "Those people have no business having that many kids if they can't take care of them." When you look at it like that, I suppose they could be right. However, the children didn't ask to be brought into this world and my support is for the kids. Who knows, maybe one of those children will be the one to discover the cure for cancer or diabetes, or invent warp drive. Or maybe they'll live an ordinary life like most of us do, but grow up to be compassionate enough to help the children of future generations. Either way, I'm happy.
• I'm thankful for Kat Coble for her warm heart. Her sharp mind and kind spirit is evident with every word she writes.
• I am so very thankful that my husband has a regular full-time job.
• I am grateful for running water and electricity. Yes, I am.
• I am grateful for Al Gore. His invention of the Internet is just dandy.
• I am thankful there are only two years left and pray to God that our next president will be more moderate, open to ideas, and ... well ... that she can restore respect and dignity to the White House and to this country.
• I am grateful for bunny rabbits.
• I am most appreciative of Smiley's 12 days series. His genius is NOT wasted. Oh! And here's the one with me, or Hera to you.
  
• I am thankful for the cute News 2 mirror that Mike Sechrist sent me.
• I am thankful that the little boy running up and down the hallway making a lot of noise won't be here all day.

Hope everyone has a nice day.

Daughter in the News

My 16-year old made the news today in an article about Rutherford County's gifted and talented program. We were shocked when we moved here that the program seems to be designed to keep kids out rather than identify and pull them in... I wish that quote had made it in the article.

Meanwhile, you can read it here. They didn't talk about how she was rejected from the magnet school because we hadn't applied on time (we lived in another state when the deadline passed) and that she went on to win the county spelling bee that year. It was the first time her school won it, so we were very proud. It also didn't talk about how grateful we were to the teachers who did recognize her academic gift and did try to challenge her.

The gifted program here really is lacking. I wish the state could somehow find the money to offer orchestra beginning in 4th grade. I wish they'd try to pull kids in the gifted programs rather than working so hard to keep them out. I wish they'd look to the general population of schools and begin making the kids participate in science fairs EVERY YEAR starting in 3rd grade. We were shocked they didn't even do those - they aren't easy, but they do teach the fundamentals of hypotheses and experiments. I wish students who consistently make all A's would be automatically considered for the gifted program. My youngest does, but she's not gifted.

But if you wish in one hand and poo in the other, guess which one will fill up first?

Another Weekend Gone

Nothing smart nor Earth-shattering entertainment in this post tonight, but here it is: I shopped successfully this weekend! Woot. I want to thank everyone who helped shop for "Christmas for the Children" and then all who helped wrap all those gifts we got. Little Kimberly, Dustin, Brandon, Katie, Amber, Maddi, Libby, and Zachary should have a very nice Christmas now. The only thing I wasn't able to get was a pair of brown shoes, but only because my writing wasn't clear enough to see if it was for a boy or girl.... I may go back tomorrow for the shoes.

Elbow feels better from my fall on Friday, but ankle and buttocks are sore. I'm so glad for shopping carts to hold on to as I walk around stores! Not sure, but I believe I'm done shopping for my kids, along with my nieces and nephews. I still haven't mailed any Christmas cards, though. Yuck. Nor any baking. Instead, I bought Comast's "Family Feud" game and have been playing the holiday version rather than doing something useful. My youngest daughter likes playing it with me. She's a sick little puppy today - spiked a 103 degree fever. The Tylenol has helped her a lot, but I told her to wake me up tonight if she feels really bad.

I did get one piece of hate email today. I had sent someone a market analysis of their home (it was a for sale by owner). The asshats sent me an email saying, "I don't know what you hoped to gain from this, but what will happen is that we'll never give you our business or recommend you." I really don't understand why people go out of their way to be nasty and ugly. I hope that the airport runway which is aimed directly at their house doesn't inhibit the sale of their home - NOT. Sigh... what jerks.

Saturday is our 20th anniversary and my parents have agreed for the girls to stay with them while the husband and I try to find a nice restaurant in Madisonville next Saturday to go to ALONE. While we're delighted to have a Christmas anniversary, it sometimes takes away the celebration because it is so close to Christmas. I asked the husband for a new vacuum cleaner for a gift. He hasn't asked for anything, so I know what he wants.

So why is it when we watch these shows about people from 13,000 years ago, some have perfectly straight, white teeth? And damn it! Why didn't Ozzy win on Survivor tonight?! Yul got by because he had the hidden idol, and everyone knew it, but every single immunity that Ozzy won was earned. And what the heck was wrong with the girls that they couldn't build a fire? Geez. I'm done now.

My Web as a Graphic

I tried for months to graph my website from Websites as Graphs. It just sat there and looked at me (so to speak) when I plugged in my web address. Once I switched to Mozilla, I tried again et VOILA! It worked and I'm so excited! Here's my pic:

Good Idea Made Great

Remember November and the NaBloPoMoFo project? You may or may not know that I was one of the lucky ones randomly selected to win a prize and I was to get 3 pounds of coffee from the Mocha Momma.

Mocha Momma is a teacher. Teachers are a breed of people who see not just children playing, learning, talking, and socializing all day, but they also witness a lot of suffering and sadness. When she contacted me, we were in the throes of the "Christmas for the Children" project so it was fresh in my brain. I replied to her that she could take the money she was planning to spend on the coffee and turn it instead into a gift for a child at her school who needed a little extra love at Christmas. She wrote back and told me about an 18-year old former student who has full custody of his much younger cousin - it's just the two of them struggling to make ends meet. At 18-years old.

Well Mocha Momma has taken it a step further and although it's now too late to officially comment, I wanted to applaud her fantastic idea. One day earlier this week, she opened a post on her blog to comments. For every unique comment she received, she donated $1. For every person who sent her an e-Card from a specific site, she donated $3. When I looked, she had 97 comments and I have no idea how many e-Cards. I thought that was fantastic.

So this is a shout-out again to the Mocha Momma who wants to be on a nice tropical island enjoying her tasty cup of joe. You are an inspiration to me to have the courage to make a big announcement like pulling money from your own pocket to help out. You are generous in spirit. You are a very positive influence. I plan to use this comment concept throughout the new year myself to help raise money for our next year's Christmas for the Children program. Thank you, Mocha Momma, for one of the greatest ideas I've seen on the Internet in a very long time.

Oh Happy Day (Mostly)

I'm having some difficulty typing tonight - my first night to be able to post in several days. Christmas festivities and obligations have sure kept this household busy. Started out with our Girl Scout party Monday night, Tuesday was the youngest daughter's very first band concert (she did great), Wednesday was quiet so I spent family time, Thursday night was our Girl Scout Service Unit party, and tonight we had Christmas caroling to try to get donations for the local food bank. We had one person donate one dollar, so I bought some diapers and soup so we wouldn't show up with only a dollar to donate. Yikes.

My day hasn't been fabulous, yet it has! It started when I spilled my coffee all over my car... grrrr. Then an amazing friend of mine who shall remain anonymous unless she chooses to reveal herself purchased her very first home. That was exciting! The builder hadn't finished everything (little things like installing appliances, etc.), so we went back to the home after closing to check the progress. As we were leaving, I stepped off the curb and fell. It was not a graceful, slow motion fall. It was a hard fall and I landed on by elbow and back in the muddy street. That hurt (and still hurts) like a sonofab*tch, let me tell you. My friend and the appliance deliveryman were gracious enough to help me get up. My friend received a lovely throw blanket as a closing gift from the homebuilder, and she loaned the blanket to me to sit on so I wouldn't get mud all over my car on my drive home. Yes, I had to go home to take a shower and wash off the mud.

Now my eye hurts. But at least my dog didn't eat kids poop medicine.

Oh... tomorrow at 12:00 noon at the Smyrna K-Mart! If you want to help us "shop for the children" meet us there! Then we'll go to my office to wrap the presents! It should be fun. And what with this damaged elbow, I'll need all the help I can get.

Sorry this is disjointed and scattered. I have been working on another "wrinkle" story, but haven't finished it. More are coming! Hope everyone has a nice, sunny weekend.

Christmas Shopping Has Yet to Happen

Every now and then I hear about women who defy the stereotype of loving to shop. I'm one of them... I hate fighting crowds, I get nervous when I look at cost (thinking I'd rather save that money for bills), I get angry at greedy store owners (remember the investigative piece that showed how stores label certain prices, but they ring up otherwise?), and did I mention the crowds? Bad bad crowd anxiety.

I have a lot of shopping left. I haven't been smart and done it online like everyone has told me. I missed out on the $1.99 screaming monkey on woot.com (dang!). This means that I now have a boat-load of shopping left. I have to buy for two daughters, husband, mother-in-law, parents (they're easy, they just want gift cards to restaurants) (Hi Mom!), sister, brothers and wives, and 13 nieces and nephews. Plus a couple of agents who I really like who live alone and really have no one else. We're having our girl scout party tonight and I need to go buy a little something for nine girls and the two co-leaders.

To top it all off, though, I also have to buy for EIGHT kids from the "Christmas for the Children" program we raised money for in the last few months. I volunteered for the biggest family because I thought it was a great opportunity for bloggers from LaVergne, Smyrna, and middle Tennessee would want to come along to help. No one has stepped up yet, though. :( To address this, I have come up with Plan B:

I want to invite bloggers to come Saturday, December 16th at 12:00 noon to KMart on Lowry St. in Smyrna to shop. We get 10% off at KMart and they also have our tax-exempt letter on file so we can get more for the money. We have $60 p/child and I have talked with the mother and she has given me detailed info on sizes, needs, and likes. I'd like to take about two hours to shop, then I want to invite the bloggers to my office at Bob Parks Realty on Sam Ridley Parkway at 2:00 p.m. to wrap the presents. We can have our blogger meeting while wrapping presents. The mother of the children told me the gifts we buy are indeed the only presents her kids will get this year. She is coming by the office on December 19th to pick them up.

I still want to open my home for a blogger potluck at some point, but given the sick husband and MIL this weekend, it really worked out for the better that the Mothership soiree was the same night. (And boy wasn't it fun!) (best dressed indeed haha).

Are there any takers to shop for the children? Pretty please with sugar on top?

Can You Have Fun and Not Drink?

The answer is yes, especially when you're surrounded by people you like and admire. I had my Sam's Club chocolate eclairs arranged in my free-for-hosting-an-idiotic-Home-Interior-party bowl, I had my cheesey real estate calendars, and I had two of my best friends (M. of This is Smyrna and Ivy) as carpool buddies. Together we set out for the famous Mothership late yesterday afternoon.

Let me say here and now how grateful I am that Kerry and gang picked yesterday as the party date, pre-empting my own Middle-Tennessee Bloggers and Podcast Meeting shindig that was previously scheduled. They did contact me and I was totally cool with it, but now I'm especially grateful because my mother-in-law and husband were both home sick and I would've had to cancel the party anyway due to that. But I am still working on a party - just don't know when at this point.

I've met a lot of our friends in blogging before, but did get to finally meet others: GingerSnaps (she could not possibly be nicer or cuter), B-Dub (he could not possibly be nicer or cuter), Sarcastro (former Realtor who wised up), Sam Davidson (dude, you are awesome), Glen Dean (future Realtor and/or Appraiser), Linda (who made me laugh until I practically cried from watching her in the gag video), Chris Wage, Blake (who doesn't post enough!), Slartibartfast (yes he has a fun name to say) and Mrs. Slartifibartfast, Rex L. Camino (briefly) and Mrs. Camino, the Holiday Grinch (actually we met before, but she wasn't a blogger then), and RUaBelle.

It was also great seeing Rachel (I didn't know Koreans turn red when they drink), John H., CLC, the Knuck, Aunt B., K-Cob, Brittney (I'm jealous of her hair, it's long enough to cut and donate to locks-of-love), Smifferoo, Kerry, the guy on my MySpace, Sara Clark, Brilliant Jag, Gunner & Elizabeth, and I'm forgetting about a kazillion people. Sorry!

I want to see Jeffraham, Malia, Sonia, Newscoma and Rodent Queen (my deepest condolences), Drama Llama, Lynnster, Mari, Shauna, Chip, and Big Orange Michael at the next one! You guys were definitely missed! And next time I'm bringing my camera.

Eating Tips for the Holidays

Nod to my cousin Sandy who emailed these:

Eating Tips for the Holidays

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.
2. Drink as much eggnog as you can and quickly. You can't find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an "eggnog-aholic" or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it!!!! Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!
3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand-alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.
4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.
5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello???
6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.
7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.
8. Same for pies. Apple, pumpkin and mincemeat - have a slice of each. Or, if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?
9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.
10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Reread tips: Start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.
    

Remember this motto to live by:
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body. But rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in hand, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO-HOO what a ride!"

Better Than Cheese

The Woo-man recently posted about how much his dogs love cheese. Like his mutts, my own Libby and Cocoa adore cheese. They'll take American, Cheddar, Colby, Shredded, Mozzarella, whatever is held in front of them. When I peel open a slice of American Cheese Food, they both get up on their hind legs and do their happy dance. Then I ask, "Who's sitting first?" The first one to sit gets the first piece. If I was as happy in a week as they are in that one minute, I'd be the happiest person on Earth.

But my dogs like one thing even more than they like cheese.

I'm not really a dog person so I didn't know this until we got our first dog three years ago. One day Libby was in the living room and I was petting her and thinking, "Gawd, your breath smells like crap." I thought it was just really bad breath. She left the room, I left the room. Several moments later we were both back and I started smelling poop again - cat poop. I looked up and that dog was chewing on a cat turd. I thought I'd puke. To stop the nonsense, the husband built a dog barrier around our kitty litter several years ago. The big dog is definitely too big for it, but when we got Cocoa, we realized she was small enough to get in the hole. It is now blocked with a giant laundry detergent box, although we don't really need it because the dogs are nearly always in the sunroom because they stink something awful.

I got tired of smelling them (plus had a really good closing this week), so today they went to Classy Clips for grooming. They were bathed, teeth brushed, nails clipped, etc. and looked (and smelled) so pretty when I brought them home that I let them back in the house. After about 5 hours of scratching their backs and bellies, Cocoa disappeared. I was suspicious, but not overly worried because of said kitty litter barrier hole now blocked by the big detergent box.

I walk into the kitchen looking for Cocoa and she's in the middle of the floor chowing down on cat crap!!! How did she get it, I wondered, as I yelled, "NO! BAD DOG!" and banished her back to the sunroom. Cleaned it up (I love those new Clorox wipes) and started looking in the laundry room. Here's what I've figured out: the little dog climbs onto the laundry detergent, hops up to the top of the barrier, steps over on the top of the kitty litter pan, drops to the floor, sticks her head in the opening, and picks up her delicacy. Then she carries it back over the barrier to eat it on the kitchen floor. (Gagging.)

I wanted to get to the bottom of why cat poop is a delicacy to dogs, so I consulted with the Great and Powerful Ivy (not that she's all knowing when it comes to dogs eating cat poop). Her theory is a good one, though. She said her veterinarian blames the cat food - it has more protein and dogs love the protein, so they eat the cat poop. The Scoop on Poop said the same thing and added:

"Dogs are particularly fond of cat poop because cat poop is high in protein. I had a friend with a dog and a cat, and he never had to clean the kitty litter. The dog took care of it."

So the protein theory is the one I'm going to hang my hat on. It's so much better than dogs are just stupid.

While researching the poop issue, I also learned about why they roll in it (along with dead, rotting things). According to the Encyclopaedia we call the Internet, it masks the their own scent so they can hunt their prey with much more ease. There's a good reason I like cats.

240. The Real Number

Thanks to Kerry and the Lynnster for telling me the dashboard light doesn't just offer paradise - it also offers the number of posts you've made. I went through and deleted all my drafts:

• Would I ever run for political office
• The good things accomplished by the Bush administration (I only found two things)
• On Being Fat (I was going to share a liposuction picture)
  

None of those had enough oomph to warrant posting. Much like this post so far! ha.

The real reason I'm here tonight is because I'm trying hard to contain myself but can't!!! My 16-year old announced what she wants to be as an adult and it's every parent's dream come true!!! I'm not being sarcastic, so it's NOT pregnant and unmarried living in a trailer down by the river.

She has decided she would maybe like to be a pediatrician because she likes kids and teaching positions just don't pay enough. If she does that, I no longer have to worry about Powerball being my retirement plan! Woot! So the husband asks her, "Are you sure you don't want to become a surgeon? You could do the gender reassignment operation changing a female to a male."

She just looked at him.

He asked, "Do you know what that operation is called?"

She said, "Ummm.. a transgender thing?"

::DRUMROLL::: "No, it's an addadicktome."

I live with clowns. But I am seriously hoping the daughter pursues a medical career. That would make me happy. The other daughter thinks she wants to be a school counselor and I like that too!

228. I Could Do This.

For all of you techperts out there... is there an easier way to know how many posts you've made without just going back and counting them? Without the "drafts" that were never published, this makes number 228. If I counted right. Also, are those nifty calendars that people have (that highlight the days there's a post) a product of LiveJournal, TypePad, or something else? I dig 'em.

Curious Elvis has left the building. Thank you very much.

Slow Donnie Lives

I used to love watching Just Shoot Me!, especially the Slow Donnie shows with David Cross. Here's an audio file to my favorite Slow Donnie song, "Chicken Pot Pie." It goes:

Chicken Pot
Chicken Pot
Chicken Pot Pie.

My husband's best friend in Atlanta has Thanksgiving dinner every year with David Cross and his sister. Close your eyes and shout "Lucky!" Thank you, Napoleon.

But my attention faltered... back to why I'm writing about this. A man and his mother in Tacoma, Washington have been faking his retardation for years and years to collect a disability check. That's pretty low. They've received $111,000 in total over the last 10 years. Wow.

On Cooking

Somewhere in my past (I think I was 12 or 13), I thought I wanted to be a chef when I grew up. It was because one evening I took over my Mom's kitchen when we lived in North Dakota and prepared a "to die for" meal of hamburgers, frozen french fries, and Tang. I even took a picture of the meal because I was so darned proud of cooking it all by myself, set the table, etc.

Well I don't do much cooking anymore since Velma moved in with us. She used to be a dietary manager at a nursing home and before that she cooked at numerous restaurants. Her mashed potatoes are seriously the very best I've ever tasted. Ever. My Mom once started to have her feelings hurt when I said that, but when she tasted them she said, "You are right. These are the best mashed potatoes I've ever tasted." OMG... they are wonderful beyond words. And she doesn't put anything but salt, butter and milk in them, so she just has a special touch.

Again, I don't do much cooking here. When a top notch cook lives with you, there is always something wrong with the food you prepare. And I refuse to cook for anyone who criticizes my food. Which brings us to Top Chef on Bravo. I love that show, but I don't know how those "contestants" stand there and take the criticism offered by the judges. I would roll into a big blubbering ball of out-of-control tears. But I love that show! It amazes me to see these chefs pull together wonderful looking dishes in a short amount of time and with nasty ingredients (animal guts, vending machine, convenience store, etc.). I also watch stunned as the judges actually taste some of them. Blech. Sorry guys, I'm not going to be tasting anything with pigs blood, lamb hearts, or chicken feet.

Meanwhile, my vote for the top chef this time goes to either Cliff or Sam, but Ilan or Mia may come out of nowhere to take it. I get tired of watching Betty (although she seems to be a supreme cook) bashing Marcel and him bothering her in return. I don't like conflict and those two seem to be driving it this season. Oh. And the host Padma Lakshmi is married to Salman Rushdie. PLUS she was a guest on Star Trek. How cool is her life?

So if you cook or you thought you'd like to cook at some point in your life, watch that show. It's fun and interesting!

Die in a Firefox, Explorer

I finally did it. I upgraded to Mozilla Firefox this afternoon and am feeling the love. Ivy tried to change me over earlier in the year, but being the stubborn jackass that I am, I resisted until :::I::: decided it was time to change. Ivy was right. My brother Jim was right (even though we never stood up to the Hallelujah Chorus when we were little because we were already standing at the end of Mass). Smifferific, John, Lynnster, Malia, John, and Tim were right too. So goodbye to Internet Explorer (well, when I get into the habit of not clicking the "blue e" on the bottom of my page). I might miss you. I might not.

I guess I need to go find some medicine for my baby girl. She's caught the crud from someone. Sneezing. Fever. Poor baby. She may have to miss baton class tomorrow night.

How About a Delish Cup from Mocha Momma?

Well howdy howdy. I won one of the Nablomopobonoplohotoboro* prizes! Woot! I want to post a great big thank you to the Mocha Momma of Cabo San Lucas (read: big dreamer in Illinois) for sponsoring a reward! And as an added treat, I'm going to blogroll her... oooooooooh. Also thanks to Fussy for all her hard work in trying to keep up with 2,000 bloggers to see if they posted every day in November. Mr. Woo also gets a big shout out for sponsoring one of the prizes. I had my heart set on the Red Swingline Stapler, but am absolutely delighted to have won from the Mocha Momma! UPDATE: Shout out to the Lynnster (Queen of the Shiznittiest Weekend) for also giving a prize. I didn't know until now!

Congrats to everyone who made it for 30 days! I hope to begin writing more wrinkle stories again shortly as I have several I've already interviewed but haven't yet written. So stay tuned.



*If you want the real name, look up.

My Brain is Empty

Tonight, it really is empty. So I thought I'd try to think about stuff. I don't want to piss off anyone else. I don't want to think too seriously about anything like religion, politics, professionalism, right to life, plastic surgery, or housecleaning, so I'm doing this instead. Read it if you want. If you don't want, don't read.

THREE THINGS

Scare me: "Come in and close the door," cockroaches, wondering about my daughters' futures.

People who make me laugh: Jon Stewart, Steve Carrell, my funny funny (at times) husband.

I love: Ice Cream, paychecks, vacations.

I hate: My temper, my singing voice, ringer on the phone of guy down the hall.

I don't understand: Why anyone besides Laura blindly supports "W," why kids today wear those baggy pants and grab their crotches, why I never had a paid position as the person in charge.

Things on my desk: Happy bell (ring it when I need some happiness), flickering lamp from sci fi writer Andre Norton's estate, envelope full of boxtop labels.

I'm doing right now: Watching Cash in the Attic, wondering when my husband and MIL are going to return from Wally World, thinking I need a shower.

I want to do before I die: Ride in a hotair balloon, publish a book, travel to Europe.

I can do: Find bumps in weird places all over my body, blog better than anyone else in my office, soothe a crying child.

I can't do: Cook well, sing well, have rhythm.

I think you should listen to: My brother's myspace site, Neil Young's version of "Four Strong Winds," Mozart.

You should never listen to: Advice from Tom Cruise, Ann Coulter, people without the ability to consider other viewpoints.

I'd like to learn: To speak Spanish, to play piano, to fly an airplane.

Favorite foods: Mom's fried chicken, homemade mac and cheese, perfectly cooked steak with sauteed mushrooms.

Beverages I drink regularly: Diet Cream Soda, Unsweet Iced Tea, Coffee (aka ambrosia).

Shows I watched as a kid: Star Trek (original), Gilligan's Island, Brady Bunch.

People I'm tagging (because they intrigue me): Ivy, Shauna, B-Dub.

MySpace Shenanigans

My daughter just posted this on her MySpace (yes, I closely monitor her MySpace usage). It's titled: Body Parts. I think she needs to learn about using all caps.

ONE TRY (NO CHEATING & NO BACKSPACING)
TYPE YOUR FIRST NAME WITH YOUR...

1.FINGERS:MELISSA
2.CHin: M EDK,IDESDAZ
3.ONE FINGER, EYES CLOSED: MDJYSSA
4.ELBOW: M,REL;I9ESDSDAWQ
5.NOSE: MELISWSWAQ
6.PALM: MEL;IOSSDSDAS
7.TOES: ,M,LKWE4RL.IIO,DS DS ZA

You try and then post it...Label it "Body Parts

Now my turn:
1. Fingers: Kathy
2. Chin: iazgtfhhy
3. One finger, eyes closed: jaghhy
4. Elbow: kksatrhy
5. Nose (this could be tricky): kathy
6. Palm: kat h y
7. Toes: klfsagtth,jnyhk

That was absurdly fun.

Please Don't Give Me a Ticket

I just read on Comcast how a police officer let two men get out of a ticket because they "rapped" for him. I suppose the hoo-ha is because of the racial implications, but let me tell you. I would absolutely rap to get out of a ticket.

"Yeah my name is Kat
I ain't no brat
But I got two girls
They like their curls
But brats they can be
Though they a product of me
I want to pinch their heads off
Until they say they have enough
They should clean their room
Or I'll give them their doom
Da da da dot da da dot dot dot"

What think you? Should I keep my day job?

My Lack of News Coma

I'm feeling sad and empty inside. I can't read Newscoma anymore and I don't know why. Well, I can read the blog when I link directly to a post like from NiT or something, but when I go to her main page to try to read all the posts, this is what happens:



I get that message that says "Internet Explorer can not open the Internet site http://newscoma.blogspot.com/. Operation aborted."

After, the next page that usually comes up is the script page: try again later blah blah blah. I :::JUST::: opened a new window to capture that screen so I can post it here, and suddenly, my Newscoma is working again. Freaky deeky.

I know my pal Ivy is going to say, "Bitch, puhleeeeze! Get Mozilla like I've been telling you for the last kazillion years!!!" (except I've never heard her say "kazillion). What does everyone else think of Internet Explorer v. Mozilla Firefox? Because at this point, I'm finally giving Firefox some serious consideration.

Oh What Fun It Was to Watch

UPDATE: Okay, so I've gotten a phone call from Mom asking if I still go to church, especially after I wrote that I didn't appreciate everyone jumping to their feet at the Hallelujah chorus and therefore blocking my view. Then I talked to my born-n-raised Baptist friend Mandi and she was shocked that I felt that way because she said "That's just what you do here. It's like when you stand for the National Anthem." I did not know this. Apparently it must be a Tennessee tradition or something because I never ever ever heard of it before. So if I have offended anyone, sorry. But I'm still not standing next time because it just feels completely unnatural to me. I will stand for the Pledge of Allegiance the National Anthem, though.

I've always wanted to see the Rockettes and it was well worth the trouble! But one of hte girls in my troop should be renamed Liar Liarson. I swear, that kid had so much fun at camp but I'm still having to hear her mom griping about it. So she had a great time at the Rockettes - I looked at her several times and she was totally enjoying it. So we get her back to Mom and she says, "It was okay, but I slept most of the time." I looked at her and said, "Stop lying to your mother. I watched you and you enjoyed it." Aaaarrgggghhhhhh! I don't know if she says that shit because she thinks it's what her mom wants to hear or if she's just a liar liar pants on fire.

But the Rockettes were a lot of fun... I really enjoyed the soldiers dance and fall. Very clever. The nativity scene was very very cool until the Alleluia song started playing - then all the asshats in front of us stood up. In front of us - our section only. Well, except for the herd of red-hatted old ladies in the very front row. People. We were not at church. We were at a paid performance. Please take your seats because while your public display of faith and worship may be admirable in the eyes of some people, it was very disrespectful of other people in the audience and very much unappreciated.

And Ivy has a tale to weave as well. So I'm going to post this gripe-fest to send her a picture to go along with her fun times.

Happy December

Lots of stuff to talk about, but not much time... I'm taking my girl scout troop to see the Rockettes at the Grand Ol' Opry this afternoon so must go pack about 20 lunches (PBJ & chips) to keep the little princesses from being irritable from starvation. Then I have to check them out of school and meet the whole gang at my office at 2:00 p.m.

The bigger thing I wanted to say, my blogger Christmas get-together is going to be postponed to a little later in December (date to be announced after I consult with family). The Nashville is Talking fans met at the Barbequemeister's yesterday and tentatively set December 9th as their date. Because we Rutherfordians do love us some pig, I felt we should go have us some pork and dogfood instead. So anyone who managed to come up with an excuse not to come to mine (I'm talking to you OrangeSkin), I'm taking away your excuse.

I will reschedule the Rutherford meeting and anyone who is extra nice to us on December 9th might be invited to ours. Stay tuned for more info later.