Wednesday, November 15, 2006

On Friendship and Cancer

I went with Ivy today to take pictures and show my support for her and Robin as she had her head shaved. Watching Ivy's hair first being braided, then cut, then shaved, then close-shaved made me realize what a noble, selfless person Ivy is. But it also made me think about what kind of friend I am.

I don't think I'd have the gonads to do what she did today without hesitation unless it was for one of my children. For my good good friends (fellow bloggers!), my sister, and mother I'd have to think pretty hard about it, but might. But for others, I think I'd probably do things like help with fundraisers, bring food over on bad days, offer to babysit, clean house, etc. But shave my head? I'm not a generous enough person, I suppose, because I would put my own selfishness ahead of compassion for others.

I also think about what Mandi said about friends. I've always thought that I give it my all to make friendships work, but I've found time and again that friends are incredibly fickle. You think you're doing just great and then you get pooped on.... one day you're having coffee and the next day your emotional investment is for naught. That in itself would give me great pause if I considered shaving my head. I guess I really don't give it my all.

Ivy was shocked when I told her there were only two people I'd shave my head for, "What? You wouldnt' do it for me??" You know, I just might. But I fervently hope that a cure for cancer is found before I have to make a decision like that. So here's to Robin. Be a survivor. Here's to my cousin Wanda. She is a survivor. Here's to my brother-in-law Larry. He lost his battle with cancer when he was 42. And here's to Ivy... you were very brave and noble today. And I am thankful there are people like you out there that schmucks like me can emulate.



Ivy - still one hot mama!

5 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hell, I'm not even sure *I* would've shaved my head for anybody. (Now that I remember how good I look with the short cut, it might be another thing...)

9:28 PM  
Blogger Lynnster said...

Oh, that's the best pic of Ivy I've seen yet so far from this! She is totally rockin' the cueball look, woohoo!

And, I don't think I could do it either, Kathy. Total admiration for her for having the guts to, that is so awesome.

10:27 PM  
Blogger Malia said...

I totally understand where you're coming from. It takes a really special kind of person to do something like that! I'm not sure I could muster such devotion except for my children and husband! I'm glad she's my friend, too!

8:43 AM  
Blogger Sonia said...

I totally understand where you're coming from. I find myself reserved when it comes to friendship. I love my friends....but I've never TOLD them I love them. I've never made the "you're my best friend" statement to anyone...ever. I guess I am closed off emotionally ...cause the only people I can say I love you to are my kids and hubby.

9:39 AM  
Blogger Newscoma said...

Your honesty about this is amazing. I cut my hair short but not bald when my mom had chemo.
She had Spock ears. We kidded her about it and for some reason, it made things a little better.

7:53 PM  

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